ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
