I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
