It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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