I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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