Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Randomize
