So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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