i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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