Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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