My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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