3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
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