What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
