His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
