I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
