but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
