Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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