dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
