Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I wish they made helmets for livers.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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