Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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