Me. At least after what I've been through.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
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Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
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He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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