I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
