I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
