He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
