I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
