I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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