haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
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there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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