Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
