Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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