Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize