Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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