in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize