I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize