what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I love you.
Bad choice
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