He is such a slut. More and more my type.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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