the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize