VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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