Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
