how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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