What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
