i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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