I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
