Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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