super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
