so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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