fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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