hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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