Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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