There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
she looked like the before picture.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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