i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
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