every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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