On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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