can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.